Hovering over the little green ‘publish’ button to send out the first issue of Wherever Notes, I was overwhelmed by a wave of fear. Not by the act of sharing, but by what sharing might bring. It wasn’t fear of rejection and failure that hit me, but the fear of acceptance and success…what if this actually works?
This month’s post wasn’t slated to explore the terrains of success and failure. But chatting with my friend during our monthly deep dive (we meet every month to dig into challenges we’re facing), we unearthed the reason I’ve been hesitating to move forward. The real anxiety that kept me from hitting that little green button was not about failing…it was about succeeding.
Embracing failure
“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” — Henry Ford
I’d be lying if I said failure didn’t scare me. In fact, I almost axed the story below because even admitting I failed petrifies me. But, you know what? I think it’s a pretty great illustration of bouncing back when things don’t go as planned…
So here it goes…
Back in 2021, I’d embarked on this crazy goal to cycle across the US. Yep, the whole thing. But after a tough ride through Virginia (who knew it had mountains? Not me.) I realized I might have bitten off more than I could chew. I hit a breaking point only one week into what was supposed to be a three month adventure…I didn’t expect to hit that point until at least Kansas. I’d been talking about this trip for months, what would people think if I quit? If I failed?
I can’t give up now…or can I?
Stepping back, I realized failing wasn’t as scary as I made it out to be. In reality, the only person I failed…me. And I realized the bike trip wasn’t the right fit for what I needed that summer. So, I switched gears and turned my trip into an epic 2.5-month road trip that ended up serving me more than the bike trip–and I still stoped to explore bike routes in nearly every state I visited. And, I can always tackle that cross-country bike challenge another time…more equipped now that I know Virginia has mountains.
That summer, I learned that failing isn’t the end of the world. It actually opened the door to a different, even better adventure that let me explore more of the US and connect with friends across the country. It taught me it’s okay to shift gears and starting over can actually lead you down a better path–with more experience in your arsenal. And next time, I know that I will be able to navigate failure even better.
Food for thought for you: what are you afraid to fail? Is failure really as scary as it seems? Or could it be an opportunity to start again with more knowledge under your belt?
Now, what about success?
“Failure isn’t fatal, but failure to change might be.” — John Wooden
You might be asking, ‘but, why would success be scary?’ Imagine, just for a second, what happens if your big idea takes off. For me, pressing that little green ‘publish’ button wasn’t just about releasing a newsletter. It was about venturing into the unknown—what changes could this thing bring? How could it change me? My relationships? Even my goals? Success means diving into a journey without a map. It brings new questions about change, identity, and the future–what will it take to succeed? Who do I need to be? Now? In the future?
Fear of change and the unknown
So, fear of success might be a little misleading. I’m not really afraid of succeeding… the real monster in my closet is a fear of change and the unknown.
Let’s use this newsletter as an example. To make it work, I need to push myself out of my comfort zone. I need to change my daily routine, adjust how I’m living, and shake up my habits… and I NEED to admit that the old ways won’t cut it anymore. Because let’s face it, sticking to the same old routine won’t get a newsletter out the door (I mean, I struggle to keep a journal, let alone a regular writing gig.)
I’ve got to tweak my mindset, carve out time for writing, and commit to creating the content here. And yeah, hit that scary little green ‘publish’ button and face whatever comes next.
And what comes after hitting publish? No clue. I don’t know what doors could open. Or what opportunities that could pop up. I’ve got a few ideas, but the truth is, I won’t really know until I take that leap and see where I land.
Facing that scary little question, ‘what’s next?’
Back in college, all I dreamt of was traveling the world. I devoured travel vlogs, hoarded Nat Geo Traveller magazines, and I even plastered my wall with sketches of places I hoped to visit one day.
My plan? Work a couple of years, save some cash, then chase after the dream.
But I didn’t want to wait. I ditched the plan a month out of school and jumped headfirst into travel. Fast forward a year and a half later, and I’d hit over 30 countries, set foot on five continents, and hit my goal to travel all before turning 25 years old. I crushed my initial goal in a fraction of the time and suddenly found myself in a place thinking, ‘what next?’ All the sudden the dream I’d planned on spending my 20s chasing was checked off. Of course there were still places to visit, but I proved I could do it and I was doing it. But I didn’t know where to go next…I felt more lost than ever…and that place is scary.
And here I am again, spinning that same feeling into this newsletter. It’s been a brainchild for five years, and now I’m finally doing it. But if it actually takes off, I’m back to facing that big, daunting question: ‘what next?’ It’s exciting, but it’s also terrifying to navigate that little question.
Navigating Fear
Confronting fear means acknowledging it’s a signpost, not a stop sign. Fear challenges us to push further, to grow, learn, and discover who we are. Every little step you take, each post published, it’s all about moving bravely into the unknown. And as my Mom always says, run head first into your fears.
I’m trying to focus on each post one at a time so I don’t get too hung up on the ‘what ifs’ and ‘what next.’ And if turns out to be a miss? I’ll shift gears to something else armed with new experience.
Parting Thoughts
“Success feels scarier than failure” is not really a hot take–it’s a reality for many of us navigating the ups and downs of personal and professional growth. It’s a reminder that sometimes, the biggest challenges come not from external setbacks, but from the internal battles we face.
I’d challenge you to ask yourself, what’s really getting in your way? Is it failure? Or success? And what’s at the root of your fear? Try running headfirst into your fears. And maybe you can hit your little green ‘publish’ button too.
Have a great month!
Becca
Where in the World:
I’m still I’m slowing down this month. But unlike last month, this month I’m writing from Cape Coral, Florida.
I never thought I’d say this, but Florida’s become almost a second home for me. My parents started snow-birding here a few years ago, and ever since, I’ve been stopping down to hang out with them between travel adventures. And it’s been a nice change of pace to have a solid routine here. Plus, it’s hard to beat our weekend adventures: searching for alligators in the Everglades, meandering on kayaks through mangrove tunnels, or exploring beaches (which in my family means at least a 7-mile walk end to end.)
Next month, I’ll still be stateside. But the gears are turning for my first international adventure of the year… flights pending…but I already have an Airbnb and a long list of ideas to map out.
Photo from the Archive:
That summer 2021 bike adventure? It wasn’t all bad. I love the first half–exploring small towns like Mineral, VA with my Mom. Yeah, you heard right, my Mom was my biking buddy for the entire Virginia stretch. The night we stopped in Mineral we camped out just outside the Firehouse here…behind that white building. Sounds romantic, but the firehouse announcements coupled with the train kept me up most of the night…travel isn’t always glamorous but makes for a good memory.
Where I Find Inspiration:
Collection of random stuff that inspired me this month:
- [Card Deck]: We’re Not Really Strangers – Credit where credit is due. These cards are an essential on my packing list. They make for great icebreakers, conversation starters, or just to pass the time when you’re on the road. And my favorite question (below) helped inspire this note.
- [Video] How to get everything you want this year by Thomas Frank – I’ve been following Thomas since his channel revolved around surviving college. He offers great insights and structure to help improve your life and be more productive.
- [Show] Masters of the Air on AppleTV+ – this show is beautifully shot and edited. I’d highly recommend giving it a watch even if just to admire the cinematography, though the writing and story is well done too.
- [Newsletter]: A Year of Mental Health by Chris Guillebeau – I’ve followed Chris’ work for a long time. I love his writing style and enjoy his view points on work, travel, life and now mental health. Here’s one of my recent favorites: 🌻 A Year of Mental Health: Is It Always Best to “Do What Makes You Happy”?
A Question for you:
What are you more afraid of, failure or success?
And why?
